Free the 'Pennsylvania 6'!

Michael Smerconish: Free the 'Pennsylvania 6'!
3.4.10
By Michael Smerconish - Daily News
Philadelphia Daily News
Daily News Opinion Columnist

I MAKE AN almost daily pilgrimage to a local Wawa for coffee. This week, I took notes.

Just inside the door was a colorful display of Doritos (150 calories per serving and 12 servings per bag). In the next aisle were the Hershey's Take5 bars - 300 calories (and 150 fat calories) each. So too were the 3 Musketeers, which despite wrappers that flaunt "45 percent less fat" still pack 200 calories for each of their two servings.

My potential shopping list bulged as much as I would if I ate all this stuff: Monster Slim Jims (290 calories, 240 fat calories and 50 percent of your recommended daily saturated-fat intake). Eight-packs of doughnuts (2,260 calories in all). Nearly two-quart containers of ice cream (2,520 calories in all). And my favorite: the 44-ounce cup of soda to drown your sorrows. Nothing good comes from 44 ounces.

Beyond the food and drink, there are the scantily clad women fronting the magazines next to the newspaper rack. And the dozens of tobacco products surrounding the cashier. All of which could get me into some trouble.

Yeah, Wawa can be a dangerous place. It seems like all you need is a shirt, shoes and a couple of bucks to further tip the scales toward an obesity epidemic, porn addiction or lung cancer.

Thank goodness I can't do real harm to myself with, say, a sixpack of beer. Thank you, Commonwealth of Pennsylvania!
I've got lots of friends in Pennsylvania looking out for me by ensuring that, unlike 46 other states, our laws prohibit the local convenience store (along with supermarkets, gas stations and even beer distributors) from selling sixpacks. The rule was established along with the Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board in 1933, days before Prohibition was repealed.

The most telling thing I've heard about that history came from Karen Heller, who reported in the Inquirer that the board was created by Gov. Gifford Pinchot with the intention of discouraging "the purchase of alcoholic beverages by making it as inconvenient and expensive as possible." Why? Doing so meant protecting "the public welfare, health, peace and morals of the people of the Commonwealth."

If Gov. Pinchot were alive today, I wonder if he'd apply the same logic to a sausage, egg and cheese croissant (500 calories)?
Every few years, it seems, an adult emerges in the legislature who wants to stop protecting us from ourselves. This time it's state Sen. John Rafferty, R-Montgomery, who's sponsoring legislation that would allow convenience stores and supermarkets - as well as the beer distributors that already sell by the case- and keg-load - to add sixpacks to their shelves. His plan demands that businesses selling the beer must card every customer looking to buy it.

Rafferty recently told me he tried updating the state's antiquated laws during the last legislative session. Special interests - namely, beer distributors and unions - blocked the idea.
"We've tweaked the bill, and we've made it fair. Even some of the special-interest people have said to us, 'Look, we're not sure where we're going to be on this bill yet, but you obviously have gone overboard to make it fair,' " Rafferty said. "We've taken into account everybody who's in the business right now selling beer and have done something to make sure that they all benefit from this piece of legislation - and number one, of course, the consumers."

Forget the moral high ground the commonwealth staked out in the waning days of the Noble Experiment. In the real world of working parents and busy schedules, Pennsylvania's laws, which force us to make separate stops for wine, beer and food, are nothing short of "unruly," "consumer-unfriendly" and "extremely inconvenient." So said ex-Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board chairman Jonathan Newman when we spoke this week.

They're also borderline offensive in the same way as Pennsylvania's ridiculous patchwork of fireworks regulations. Anyone who can prove he lives outside the commonwealth is free to purchase whatever he wants from fireworks stands within the state's borders. Pennsylvanians, however, are barred from doing so by state law - forced to celebrate July Fourth with sparklers and noisemakers.

INSTATE imbibers, meanwhile, can buy a keg or a case from one of the state's 1,300 licensed beer distributors. But hitting Wawa for a Stoudt's sixpack threatens our health more than some of the junk on the shelves already?

Reminds me of that incessant Kit-Kat (218 calories per serving) jingle:

"Gimme me a break."

Listen to Michael Smerconish weekdays 5-9 a.m. on the Big Talker, 1210/AM. Read him Sundays in the Inquirer. Contact him via the Web at www.smerconish.com.